Thursday, September 24, 2009

Just some Perspective

“For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have posted alot lately about the wonderful, fun things that we have been experiencing in our new city and with our new friends. Each time I post I think of not only what I have gained in this move to Virginia, but what I have lost by leaving Alabama. That is what I am learning through this move, how loss and gain are so deeply intertwined. What I started learning as a child in a military family I am now learning from the new perspective of a wife and mother, an adult.

I don't sit and dwell on what we have lost. And when I say lost, I mean in a temporary sense, the loss of seeing friends and family on an almost day to day basis. Friends who had gone to college with me, gotten married the same month or year as me, birthed babies and watched them grow with me- our children became friends and it was such a gift, an amazing time of life to share. I had family so close- a yard away, an hour away, and several hours away! Family that would be there for me at a moment's notice and that I love so much it makes my heart ache to think of the distance between us. I could go on about these things that bring tears to my eyes, but in the midst of it I see

The things that I have gained, that we have gained as a family- some are obvious and some are yet to be discovered. One night recently we were driving home from a beautiful evening, dinner at the house of some new friends we had met at our new church. We had eaten a delicious meal in their backyard, getting to know several new couples and their children, enjoying the coolness in the air and the fresh food. Jay and I talked about how these people have already made our lives richer, more varied- and also how we have become the "new people" with no connections, no standing in the community, realizing our dependence on God to establish our steps here. It is humbling but invigorating to me- think of what we can learn from our new position and our new friends! It doesn't take away from the richness of friends long established, rather it makes me realize even more what a breathtaking gift true friendship really is.

We have been uprooted and transplanted. For plants this is usually done for their own good, to allow them to stretch and grow, to gain new nutrients from the fresh soil. To give them more light, a different view that might be the difference between thriving and just surviving. Each plant has different needs, and the gardener knows this. And the thing about my Gardener is that he is also my Creator- the one who knows.


So as we live out God's purpose here in Virginia we will embrace the bittersweetness of it, knowing that His love is our home, not some geographical location on a map. I will live life to the fullest here, not moping or wishing I were somewhere else, though I am sure I will have days where I struggle with this. I will try to learn more about the paradox of loss and gain as I go. I will have sad, sad moments, missing family and friends, but I will follow where He leads me and just cling to Him.

6 comments:

Jennifer said...

It makes my heart hurt too, Merrill. Not just that you are not here but that there is a big part of me that wants to know all this new stuff in your life. I want to put faces with names and know how to drive to your house. To see your yard as the seasons change and your neighborhood at Christmas. To know what your church looks like (with the steeple Ruthie loves). At the same time, I am also excited for you and all that the Lord has for your family. I can already tell that your adventurous nature has much to explore and discover there...and I'm thankful for your recent blogging streak to hear all about it.

Kelli Hodges said...

You just have to write a book Merrill. You have a such a gift. We miss you guys so much. I can't wait to wrap my arms around Ruthie, Mac and Harris.

Merrill said...

thanks sweet friends/sisters! I love you guys and miss you so much!

Anonymous said...

Hey Merrill...just catching up on your blog. Tears in my eyes. I will think of you in the kids when we go to the pumpkin patch this year. Maybe we can plan to do it on the same day....so it will be like we are doing it together, apart.Love You.
Shay

nick, robyn and taylor said...

Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. Thanks Merrill.

Parks Avenue said...

Sweet Merrill:) I am thankful for the things our God is teaching you and in many ways teaching us as well through you! We certainly miss you guys terribly and My little Paigey asks about Ruthie on a regular basis! She is convinced that surely she will be here by the time her birthday roles around! They share that same kindred spirit of a princess you know;) Love you!